Finding suitable childcare is something that every parent worries about. First and foremost, trust your gut. It’s normal to feel reluctant to be away from your child and nervous with a new babysitter. However, if your feelings of unease do not go away or if you start to feel uncomfortable with anyone who is caring for your child, it may be time to find a new babysitter.

According to Parent Herald and Baby Center, signs that your babysitter is not a good fit might include:

• recurring tardiness

While everyone has found themselves running behind at one time or another, a pattern of tardiness shows that your babysitter may not respect your decision or their responsibility. Just as you wouldn’t consistently show up late to your job, neither should she.

• lack of communication

It is common practice to have a check-in with your babysitter upon your arrival home to ask about the activities and highlights of their time with your child. If the babysitter seems reluctant or doesn’t remember what they did together, this could be taken as a sign that they weren’t paying all that much attention.

• down-playing your parenting styles or trying to enforce her own

There is no one way to parent a child, but the right way to parent your child is determined by you. If your babysitter undermines the rules of your house or behaves with your child in ways that you are not comfortable with, this is a sign that they may not be the right fit.

• inviting friends over the house without permission

Your babysitter is a guest in your home, and should treat their time there as such. Many parents allow a trusted babysitter to have a friend over when their child goes to bed, but this typically happens after it has been discussed and permission has been granted. If your babysitter breaks your trust by inviting someone into your home without discussing it with you, this might be a sign that they cannot be trusted to have good judgment.

It’s common for children to show resistance to their parent leaving, especially when they are very young and/or when they are meeting a new babysitter. As your child becomes more comfortable with her babysitter, signs of fear, anxiety, and discomfort should decrease. However, sometimes, the refusal to be left with a certain person can be a sign of something more serious. Because of that, we encourage all parents to know how to recognize the signs of abuse.